The Princess's Diaries

Thursday, June 30, 2005

My Adventure: Setting Sail!


A-harrr me hearties! I've been docked in this port for too long! I don't know the name of the port yet, but God might tell me later. At any rate, my feet are itching for the open seas and i have to be leaving at once! My Captain has called me aboard his ship; he has called me to join him on an adventure. As Katy and I prayed tonight, i committed my journey once again into his trustworthy and loving but wild hands and we set sail. I had such a strong image of my Captain and I standing on the forecastle, the wind blowing in our hair as we looked into the sunrise and said to each other "now bring me that horizon!"

Friday, June 24, 2005

My Trance

My heart aches and aches and aches and aches.

I don't really know how to express this in words. It's visceral, primordial, transcendent. It's when music just fills you and lifts you and you feel overwhelmed by it and it's part of you and you're part of it and you have to dance, you just have to, you can't not move, and the light shines into your eyes and you can't see anything else and it's pure worship.

I could dance forever. Even when i've been dancing for ages i still feel like i could dance all night long.

This has come up because for the last two nights i've been at different lancaster college Extravs where Nath (Messenger) has been DJing, and the music is just incredible. I don't know the proper names for the styles of music but i know that the best is trance. Ideally there are no lyrics just music, or where there are lyrics they are simple and repetitive. This is what you can get lost in. Several times i've been so overcome by it that i've opened my eyes to discover myself with my arms outstretched in surrender and i'm calling out in tongues to God.

I rarely feel like this in church. I know some people do so i guess its different things for different people. But church isn't the only place to worship. Unfortunately lancaster is seriously lacking in clubs for good music.

Listen to 'Talk' by Coldplay.

Coldplay make beautiful songs. They are a very rare example of combining amazing music with amazing lyrics. Their songs induce the sensations i described.

Ah, euphoria

Friday, June 17, 2005

My Aslan 2

Thought i'd also let y'all know bout my bootiful lion. Our art deadline was 9am monday morning and for the last 2 weeks (since my art theory exam) i've been in the department all hours - often starting 8.30 am and going home on the last bus at 1.08am which is pretty knackering! for the first of those 2 major weeks i spent every night covering the beast in fibreglass which i was constantly scared would stick inside my lungs and kill me (even went to the nurses' unit one night) and the second week was spent covering the fibreglass in wadding and fur. it is such gorgeous fur - it's all golden and scruffy. and of course the biggest palava was making his mane which is thousands of unravelled strands of wool - thank you to all my friends who helped out! couldn't have done it without you!

Now he's living in his special room ( a photography darkroom padded out with duvets on the walls, carpet on the floor and blankets draped hazardously across the light fittings) and he seems perfectly at home there. Come monday morning he was not quite finished (my biggest regret is that he has no sharp claws) but he'll do. He's also slightly too soft rather than muscular.

When i've figured out how to put photos on my blog i'll post one so you can see him!

My Jesus, My Lifeline

What is God like? Is his heart good?

"So long as we imagine that it is we who have to look for God, we must often lose heart. But it is the other way about; He is looking for us. And so we can afford to recognise that very often we are not looking for God; far from it, we are in full flight from him, in high rebellion against him. And he knows that and has taken it into account. He has followed us into our own darkness; there where we thought finally to escape him, we run straight into his arms. So we do not have to erect a false piety for ourselves, to give us the hope of salvation. Our hope is in his determination to save us, and he will not give in."

(Simon Tugwell from Prayer, in The Sacred Romance by John Eldredge and Brent Curtis)

Jesus i ran from you. i ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and it seemed when i looked over my shoulder that you were further and further away and yet i ran straight into your arms.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

My 21st Birthday

I've not had time to write for the last couple of weeks what with the lion growling for attention at all times, but now that the deadline has passed and i've had about 12 hours sleep in a row, i feel ready to return to the computer!

My birthday was fab! It was just a really lovely day. i was like a small child, extremely over-excited and giggly. It was great being on a Sunday. This meant i got to go to church and see my whole big family. There's not really anywhere to go for an night of dancing on a Sunday so i had an afternoon barbeque instead at my house. I think this was much better than attempting to have a night out anyway, because i got to spend proper time with my friends rather than having to shout over loud music and deal with the fact that only a few of my friends actually go to night clubs for the same reason as me. forget the drinks, the chat, the socialising, i just love staying on the dancefloor the whole night, and i prefer my music to have a beat and no words. Which is mostly what i had at my party! yay!

Here are some of my higlights:

  • Nathan DJing. He's amazing and looks so cool and plays brilliant music and i just wanted to dance all the time so thank you to my friends who finally gave into my pleading and danced with me in my living room!
  • The lovely weather! It was hot and sunny and we had the bbq in the back yard and all the doors open.
  • Friends being so loving just by making an effort. For example Harriet came all the way from Luton which is a big big journey, and so did my bro Stef, and the first years who had pressing exam revision but still came to spend time with me.
  • Harriet! so good to see my lovely friend and catch up.
  • Stef! Thanks for coming bro, i know it's always an effort for you to get up off your buttt and do anything ;) We had a right laugh - we made Random Chocolate Fudge Banana Cake by making up the recipe as we went along and it was okay which was a miracle! My mates thought you were a well cool dude and that we are very similar (which makes me a well cool dudette, oh yeah)
  • Sitting on the big lawn of the hotel that's just across the road watching some of us play frisbee but avoiding the strenuous activity by having a nice chat whilst pulling up grass (who else always does that when sitting on the grass?!)
  • In church, Ife embarassing me by singing Happy Birthday in the loudest voice you'll ever hear except in an opera.
  • My housies, who tidied up thwe whole house and rearranged the living room in a really good way and arranged lots of food for the bbq.

Thanks to everyone for coming and giving me a happy happy day!